How far?

I never really realized it til just now, but I seem to be in a beautiful stage in my life in which I honestly ask myself “how far can you push it?” what’s “it” you ask? for me it’s running, how far can I go, or lifting weights, how much can I muster. At least those have been the arenas in which I’ve asked those questions recently, but just this evening during a really awesome (solo) jam session on the drum set, I had to ask myself “how far can I take this? how good could I really get? what’s possible?” At that moment something else occurred to me, and a switch deep down inside about the way I perceive musical abilities got switched. I realized that the question I need to be asking myself when I sit down at an instrument is not “am I any good?” but rather “how much can I get better.”

Before I mention a project I want to undertake about improving my drumming, I want to mention why I feel so much more excited about pushing my own creative limits; in the past I have often looked to everyone else to set the stage, provide the challenge creatively or even be a partner in pushing the boundaries of what is musically or visually possible, yet unfortunately I’ve never really found very well matched partners in art. I’d like to write about why in more detail in the future.

So I thought “hmm, I wonder how good could I become? I’ve already got an almost 21 year head start. What if I made a plan of action to improve and saw where it would take me in a year?.” So I’d like to kick it off on Christmas because it will be my 21st drumming anniversary. I want to do it like this: there will be different categories, such as sight reading, rudimental drumming, groove and physical endurance tests, they will be partly subjective and objective as possible. One of the things I need to keep in mind is the fact that I really will be trying to only compare myself to myself which is what it’s all about.

I want to close by mentioning that this project is also about overcoming fears of mine, fears that there are certain things I just really can’t do on the drums, but they only exist because I’ve convinced myself that they are true over the years. But trying is the name of the game, maybe there will be a task which I will truly never be able to do (like playing along to Limelight by Rush note for note) but I can’t know unless I’ve tried, and tried my best.